Suicide Safety Planning

Awareness is just one step in suicide prevention. Asking if someone has thought about suicide and taking action can be vital in saving a life. Having suicidal thoughts or thoughts of self harm does not mean you are broken or crazy, it just means that you can no longer do this alone and you absolutely don’t have to. Hope and help is out there.

Read to learn more about what a suicide safety plan is and how you can implement one for yourself or your loved ones. Feel free to save and share the tiles via your social media channels.

If you or someone you love is in crisis, you are not alone. Dial 988 for 24/7 access to crisis support.

cite: verywellmind.com

What is a safety plan?

A suicide safety plan is a written set of instructions that you create for yourself as a contingency plan should you begin to experience thoughts about harming yourself. It contains a series of gradually escalating steps that you follow, proceeding from one step to the next, until you are safe.

Creating a plan

Work with someone or several people you trust when you are feeling well and can think clearly. Put it in writing, keep it somewhere easily accessible, and inform anyone who is a part of it.

Here's what to include:

Warning signs

Think about the types of situations, images, thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that might precede or accompany suicidal urges for you.

List these warning signs so that you can refer back to them when deciding whether to activate your plan.

Reasons for living

Create a list of your reasons for living.

Ways to calm/comfort yourself

Create a list of activities that can be soothing to you when you're upset. If you can't think of any examples off-hand, you may want to try some mind-body methods that have helped others, such as breathing exercises or body scan meditation.

Trusted contact information

Keep a list of contacts you can talk to if self-help measures do not work. List names, phone numbers, or other contact information, and be sure to have back-ups in case your first or second choices are unavailable.

Professional Resources

Create a list of all professional resources available to you, along with their phone numbers, email addresses, and other pertinent contact information. This is also a good place to keep a number for a crisis hotline such as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.

Ways to Make Your Environment Safe

Plan what steps you can take to make yourself safe. This may involve removing or securing any items that you are likely to use to hurt yourself, or going to another location until the urges have passed. It may also involve getting another person involved to help you. If you feel like hurting yourself, you might plan to go to a public place to distract yourself. Or, if you are feeling suicidal and have access to a gun, you might ask someone to keep it at their house.

Using your plan

If you begin to experience any of the warning signs of suicide listed in your suicide safety plan, proceed through the steps you have previously outlined for yourself, one by one, until you are feeling safe again.

An exception would be if you are feeling out of control and are strongly thinking of suicide. In that case, it is best to call either a trusted friend who can be with you immediately or emergency services.

Tools

safety planning apps are available via the app store

Safety Plan

ReMinder

Beyond Now

For a safety plan template, visit zerosuicide.edc.org

Resources

9-8-8 National Crisis Line

@988lifeline

Crisis Text Line

Text TALK to 741-741

Veterans Crisis Line

Send a text to 838255

SAMHSA Treatment Referral Hotline (Substance Abuse)

1-800-662-HELP (4357)

RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline

1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

National Domestic Violence Hotline

800.799.SAFE (7233)

National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline

1-866-331-9474

The Trevor Project

1-866-488-7386

@trevorproject

9-8-8 Crisis Line Launching July 16th

The 9-8-8 crisis line for behavioral health (mental health & substance use crisis counseling) is launching on July 16th. Let’s talk about what that means.

Here’s the link to the article we used to answer the most pressing questions below from Psychiatric Times. It provides a great overview of the program and additional resources for learning more along with a “Roadmap to the Ideal Crisis System.”

First off, what does this mean?

On July 16, the US will “soft launch” a new number for behavioral health emergencies. 9-8-8 connects to the existing National Suicide Prevention Lifeline which will continue to provide 24/7 access to crisis counseling for anyone experiencing a mental health or substance use crisis via phone, text, or chat.

When to use it?

When connection to local resources is less important, 988 is a great option because it is easy to remember and use. You will always get a consistent response from a trained crisis counselor. You can access help via text and chat even if your local call center does not yet have that capability. Veterans can easily access the Veterans Crisis Line via 988.

What about when you need local resources?

What happens when you call 988 can be highly dependent on where you live; thus advice about using 988 will need to be tailored to local communities. via Psychiatric Times™

In Louisiana, dialing 211 connects callers to information about critical health and human services available in their community. via louisiana211.org

What's next for this initiative?

The 988 number improves the availability and quality of crisis counseling via phone, text, and chat, but it does not create additional services. However, the planning process has prompted communities to improve coordination of existing resources, and many are working to develop new services including implementing mobile crisis teams (by 2025).

The 988 soft launch is just the beginning. SAMHSA’s long-term vision is that every community will have access to a robust and well-coordinated crisis system, where police are not the default first-responders for behavioral health emergencies, that ensures everyone has someone to call (988), someone to respond (mobile crisis), and somewhere to go (crisis facilities). States have received funding to plan and build these next-level crisis services, with additional funding legislation in development.

This is an amazing step toward behavioral health crisis intervention but we still have a long way to go and we certainly can’t do it alone 💛

WISHING YOU PEACE THIS HOLIDAY SEASON

We know the holidays aren't always the happiest. And today, as wishes of joy fill the air, we want you to know that whatever you're feeling is valid and you are so very not alone. We want you to find peace and hope in the smallest moments, but we also know that this season can come with sadness and pain, especially as we close out a year of immeasurable loss.

As we ring in a new year, socially distant from a world we once knew, it may be hard to find a reason to celebrate. And if you choose not to, that's ok too. But you are still here, and it can totally be enough to just celebrate you.

We've compiled some resources to hopefully make wherever you are on your journey a little bit easier.

Wishing you safety, peace, and a bit of hope this holiday season. ​

• Office of Behavioral Health Keep Calm Line 1-866-310-7977

• If you need assistance finding food, paying for housing bills, accessing free childcare, or other essential services, visit 211.org or dial 211 to speak to someone who can help.

• National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255

• Text HOME to 741741 and you’ll be connected to a trained Crisis Counselor. Crisis Text Line provides free, text-based support 24/7.

• For any victims and survivors of domestic violence who need support, call 1-800-799-7233 or 1-800-799-7233 for TTY, or if you’re unable to speak safely, you can log onto thehotline.org or text LOVEIS to 22522.

• Call 800.656.HOPE (4673) to be connected with a trained staff member from a sexual assault service provider in your area.

• Listen to the Along the Gravel Road Podcast as guests share about their own mental health journeys.

• The Mental Health America In The Open podcast explores the holiday blues and ways to cope with stress and anxiety as the holidays ramp up and wrap up - especially with the changes that the COVID-19 pandemic has brought.

• TWLOHA When the Holidays Are Hard written by Xander Bell

• Mental Health during the Holidays by Mental Health First Aid USA

• Maintaining Mental Health During the Holidays (And a Pandemic) by NAMI

• Preparing for the Holidays During Covid-19 by MHA

• Setting Healthy Holiday Boundaries During the Holiday Season by Where's the Line?

• Enjoy the Holidays with More Mindfulness by the Child Mind Institute

• Coping With Grief During the Holidays by the American Cancer Society

RACISM IS THE OPPRESSION THAT IS KILLING THE BLACK COMMUNITY MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY

WRITTEN BY LARA ASHLEY

Racism is the oppression that is killing the Black community mentally and physically.

The Black community is dealing with two viruses: COVID-19 and racism. Both are killing us. Black people have reportedly been dying at a rapidly higher rate with COVID-19, with 75% of the frontline workers being people of color. A frontline worker, a Black EMT, was killed in her home while resting from working tirelessly caring for the ones who contracted the virus.

The community was shocked over her death. We tried to cope with it, as well as trying to deal with the looming disease in our hometowns. We listened to experts and health officials who reported that while quarantining, it would be best for our mental and physical health to exercise and jog outside. A simple jog became a fearful act for the Black community, feeling that they would be targeted and shot in their own neighborhoods. Soon, any everyday action became a fearful one, not even feeling safe stopping at the store. Even that could lead to death at the police officer's knee, while the other officers watch you die in the street with cameras in your face.

An organization called the ADAA has done studies on how racism affects mental health. In ADAA’s racism studies, they have found that Black people suffer from anxiety, depression, psychological distress, and trauma distress from seeing and experiencing racism. Because of this racial trauma, people of the Black community struggle with fear, hypervigilance, confusion, shame, or guilt following the experience, blaming themselves for the person projecting racism towards them.

Racial trauma can be triggered by the cumulative effects of experiences of racism or by one specific experience. Hashtags like #imtired, #whatsnext, and #stopkillingus on social media platforms have indicated this, with people expressing their reactions to killings and mistreatments of Black people. Another way racial trauma comes into effect is through the transmission of historical context across generations. Black people have heard the stories of their grandparents fighting in wars that they were forced into, and they have seen pictures of their parents, uncles, and aunts marching during the Civil Rights Movement. For the Black community of today, they are thinking, "When is it enough?".

Chelsea Walton, Psy.D says that the senseless murder of George Floyd spurred a call for change in a system that allows disproportionate and unjustified violence against Black people.

It is a never-ending cycle that too many community members have experienced and have to cope with on a day-to-day basis. A Black mother posted on Facebook, "I sometimes can't handle my emotions and have to protect my mental health, but over the last few days, I've found myself fighting back the tears and not trying to become angry." Dr. Walton said that the effects of racism are insidious when they are not overt. She comments, “Those who have an awareness of this, it can create feelings of lack of control and agency.” She continues to say that there's a mental and emotional exhaustion of constantly being aware of the environment one lives in, which is necessary for survival. “Racism has deleterious effects on the mental health of Black people. It’s important to highlight that despite challenges, the Black community faces systemic and systematic racism, we continue to see the resilience needed to change the status quo,” she says.

Black people are struggling with finding their ability to influence the environment. The Black community has been told to "get in line" with society's expectations (like having a legal gun and announcing to the officer that it is in our possession), to show respect (similarly to the Black woman who called police to help a dispute in her neighborhood and Yvette Smith being the one shot at by police.) and to value the ones who are here to protect us (Gilbert Flores raised his hands in surrender to police and remained motionless as the officers shot and killed him.). If we comply, then incidents like these will not happen. However, we see countless and countless times again that this alone will not stop the killings. If a white man can kill nine Black people in a church and come out of it wearing a bulletproof police vest, Black people should be able to breathe again.

Racism requires many moments of metanoia; we bring forth a new worldview on the issue. The protests and social media posts are all ways for the Black community's concerns and fears to be heard. It is not about changing anyone's mind; Black people's bodies and minds have burned from the trauma of racist people. We understand that no matter how many marks are left on our bodies, some people's ideals will never change. Right now, we want our criminal justice to change, and we want justice to be served.

Thankfully, the You Aren’t Alone Project has dedicated its time and resources to provide a haven for individuals to discuss their mental health openly. Numerous therapists conduct virtual therapy sessions to help Black people cope with their reality. These resources are here to help cope with what is present in today’s society. The real cure, though, is for the Black community to feel that they are valued in this world.

Follow Lara Ashley on Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn
Portfolio | Website

LIVING IN QUARANTINE: THE AFTER EFFECTS

 PUBLISHED IN BATON ROUGE PARENTS MAGAZINE MAY 2020

In order to escape the Great Plague affecting Cambridge, Newton retreated in isolation to Woolsthorpe where he came up with his theories of gravity, optics and calculus.

After a wildfire, landscapes will explode with thousands of flowers known as a superbloom and come back even more beautiful and healthier than before.

Hurricane Sandy rid Long Island Bay of its polluted water--the constant surge of the tides dispersed toxins in the bay and returned the water cleanliness to levels not seen since the mid-1970s.

Shakespeare wrote ‘King Lear,' 'Macbeth' and 'Antony and Cleopatra' as London reeled from an outbreak of the bubonic plague in 1606.

What a beautiful thought it is that things, and people, can come out of a state of devastation and isolation even stronger than before.

Covid-19 forced many of us into self-isolation. In this isolated state, emotions can be heightened, and mental health can be gravely affected. A recent review in Psychology Today on the effects of quarantine on individuals points to increased confusion, anger, post-traumatic stress symptoms, and extended periods of grief, sometimes lasting even three years after the end of the quarantine. Stressors range anywhere from longer quarantine duration, inadequate information and supplies, and infection fears, to frustration, boredom, grief, financial loss and stigma.

Of course, people with a history of mental illness are at increased risks, but no one is immune to the mental effects that isolation and fear can have during and after a pandemic. And, for some, those effects will last long after the virus is gone. In addition, health care workers and others on the frontlines are facing even more dangers to both their physical and mental health. These workers, especially, will need continued support after this is over.

Effects on Children
The good news for parents is that psychologists who work with childhood trauma agree that children are incredibly resilient. According to child psychologist Jessica Wozniak, we’re going to see a range of effects from this pandemic on children based heavily on family and community circumstances. Some will be mild and short-term such as trouble sleeping, increased worry or behavioral outbursts, while others may see more long-term effects of post-traumatic stress disorder. It is noted that there are factors that can decrease a child’s ability to withstand trauma. A child’s proximity to the event can be a factor. In this case, children are just as impacted as adults, but parents do have the ability to monitor their intake of news surrounding the pandemic and are encouraged to do so. The likelihood of long-term trauma also increases for children who are already in an unstable state. It will be more important than ever to make sure disadvantaged populations have adequate access to mental health care and ongoing support.

Wozniak stresses that children most often look to caregivers for how to react and cope with trauma. The more adjusted a caregiver is, the calmer children will be, especially as life starts to return to a sense of normalcy. As with adults, giving children some agency over the isolation and being away from friends by making sure they know they are helping others and contributing to the greater good can provide comfort and a sense of pride. That shared purpose can also bring a family even closer together and add value moving forward. It is also likely that we will continue to see small changes in this generation, such as being more reluctant to shake hands or leaning into technology even more. Only time will tell. What we do know is that we need to continue being compassionate and understanding with one another. We are all experiencing this together, after all, and no one has all the answers.

Shining a Light on Mental Health
On the bright side, mental health is being talked about more than ever before, and people are even more aware of the importance of taking care of their overall well-being. During the pandemic, self-care has been deemed a necessity for most, with many organizations sharing resources for taking care of one’s mental health, counselors switching to tele-health services and individuals sharing at home self-care routines. Crisis hotlines saw calls increase in the thousands during this time. We also saw people making an active effort to connect with each other through virtual game nights, Zoom happy hours, drive-by birthday “parades,” and through other innovative means.

As we go back to normal, it’s important to identify which parts of “normal” are worth going back to.

Where we go from here matters.
As we’ve seen throughout history, some of the world’s greatest creations came from a forced state of isolation, and regrowth is often healthier after a state of disruption. Jessica Carson, Neuroscientist and Psychologist, stresses the importance of using this situation as an opportunity to reallocate energy and find balance. Imagine dividing 12 units of energy across four areas, family, occupation, recreation and dreams (making dreams a reality). What did it look like before Coronavirus? What does it look like now? And, where do we want to go from here?
​
Written by Chelsea Borruano

MY DISORDER THRIVES IN THESE LONELY MOMENTS

WRITTEN BY: BECCA AMES

​we compare our pain as if there is only a certain amount in this world to be given. rank our suffering, use it to give or deny ourselves the permission to feel. there are people who are sick, dying, losing their jobs, people who never had them to begin with. people who are hungry. who are you to be experiencing anything but gratitude?

I am overwhelmed by my sadness, the strength to which my feelings can overtake me in a matter of seconds, dragging me to the depths of despair as I sit comfortably in an air-conditioned apartment with a fridge that is full and a fluffy little creature nestled at my toes. you are not worthy of sadness today, the voices say.

my disorder thrives in these lonely moments, feeding on the guilt and shame of asking for too much from a world that is - for all intents and purposes - tapped out. I berate myself for the messiness of my feelings, shave away the excess so I too can fit in the box of all that is ‘just right’.

I live in constant fear that the bigness of what is happening inside of me is wrong, that my taking of space will overwhelm the people I love and force them to disappear.

but there is something freeing in this quiet, a knowing emerging from its hiding place. I am confronted each day by a shadow that used to dance behind all that is life beyond this. I ran from its darkness, its silhouette stretching thin in my wake until disintegrating into nothing at all.

but now, the shadow stands just slightly taller than myself, cast from a light that is close by.
I am here, it seems to say, announcing my existence.

I am learning to be alone. and maybe it’s because I didn’t bring this upon myself that it feels lighter than it would in another time, a purposeful act of being alone that is not representative of an absence of love but perhaps even a surplus of it.
maybe I am not a mess. maybe I am just a person who feels deeply in a messy world. and maybe there are others who feel this way - completely and without hesitation, others who read what I write and feel the pressure release. others who feel the weight of this loneliness lifting.

maybe we’re not overreacting. maybe we’re not broken.
maybe we’re just paying attention.

WHAT DOES ANXIETY LOOK LIKE?

It looks like the light tapping of your fingers on a desk in a perfect pattern.
It looks like biting your nails till they bleed.
It looks like staring off into space.
It looks like ignoring someone you love.
It looks like leaving a packed room to get some air.
It looks like anger, fear.
It looks like shortness of breathe.
It looks like thoughtfulness.
It looks like tears.
It looks like the “party pooper” or “lightweight” who’s going home early.
It looks like humor.
It looks like tossing and turning in bed.
It looks like nothing.

All the while, on the inside, it feels like chaos, compulsion, uncontrollable energy. It’s fighting to breathe, to think a clear thought, to focus. It feels painful. It feels better to be alone even if it means leaving your friends and what looks like fun. It feels like you could’ve said something better, did something differently. It’s running through your day in your head, questioning every decision you’ve made.

It feels like everything.

Anxiety is real. It’s not something you can just let go or get over. Your feelings are so very valid. It’s also something that we shouldn’t be afraid to talk about or feel judged for. It’s something we should be able to openly talk about so we can help each other overcome it.

It’s not nothing and you aren’t alone.

SUICIDE PREVENTION WEEK

It's national suicide prevention week. As this project has evolved, I've gotten a lot of questions about losing someone to suicide. What are the signs? What could I have done differently? How do I get past the guilt? The short answer, I honestly don't know. The long answer, well, there are warning signs but they're usually minute, if they show outwardly at all. I believe it starts with being open and bold in our conversations about mental health, depression, suicide, self-harm, addiction, etc.

The guilt question is the hardest for me to address. I think, as human beings, we're wired for it; and someone you love taking their own life will leave you with more questions than answers. The more uncertainty we face, the easier it is to look inward and blame ourselves. All I can offer is this, depression is a disease and for some, it's a losing battle. You don't blame yourself for the person you love getting cancer so why do we think we can take on the weight of depression? The hope I have is that, while cancer is more or less in the hands of science and skilled medical professionals, mental health support isn't. We have resources, and they're growing everyday. We're having the right conversations. We're erasing stigmas. We're making medical advancements in treatment. And we're not doing it alone anymore.

So, to you, whoever you are, wherever you are, You Aren't Alone. We are better together and the world is a better place with YOU in it. Please don't take that away. Today, choose to stay.

For more information and resources, visit the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.

If you think someone is thinking about suicide, assume you are the only one who will reach out. Here’s how to talk to someone who may be struggling with their mental health.

1. Talk to them in private

2. Listen to their story

3. Tell them you care about them

4. Ask directly if they are thinking about suicide

5. Encourage them to seek treatment or to contact their doctor or therapist

6. Avoid debating the value of life, minimizing their problems or giving advice

If a person says they are considering suicide

• Take the person seriously

• Stay with them

• Help them remove lethal means

• Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

• Text TALK to 741741 to text with a trained crisis counselor from the Crisis Text Line for free, 24/7

• Escort them to mental health services or an emergency room

COMMITMENT TO CHANGE

This week, Betty Mujica-Milano, president of our board of directors, and I, stood in front of a gymnasium full of hundreds of high school students, slightly terrified I must admit, and poured our hearts out about the project. We walked into that gym having flashbacks to high school and wondering what the heck we had gotten ourselves into, but let me tell you, we walked out with, well, hope.

You see, a couple of weeks ago, I got an email from an English teacher at Dutchtown High who sponsors a new club the students there put together called "Be the Change" with the goal of creating a more positive school environment and enriching the well-being of the students. This club planned an incredible (and completely voluntary) event called Commitment to Change where students and volunteers, like myself and Betty, could openly talk about mental health and wellness.

And that we did. Ya'll, that fear we had going in immediately dissipated the moment these students started opening up about what they're going through. We talked through some coping mechanisms; we talked at length about the power of having a trusted adult to talk through your problems with; we talked about the importance of having at least one friend you could pour your heart out to and, in turn, be there for. We talked about self-care and vulnerability and support. We talked about real pain. And then we watched a group of teens, from freshmen to seniors, sit in a circle on the floor surrounding one of their fellow classmates, but ultimately a stranger among a sea of 2400 students, to comfort her as she expressed her pain and anger. We saw them cry together, we witnessed them be vulnerable about what they've gone through, and we heard them make an oath to meet up the next morning. And then we watched as they took the first steps in the planning process with one of their teachers to start a peer support group. And ya'll THIS, this is what the project is all about.

When we arrived, we were given a sheet of paper with questions the students had submitted that we could use to guide the discussion. As I left, I realized that we didn't touch on some of these so I'd like to do that now. As I told the students honestly, I am not a mental health professional. I'm just a girl who's been through some shit (ok, I didn't use the word shit) but I made it out the other side and I didn't do it alone. And you don't have to either. So these are strictly my opinions based on my own experience. Please, if you have anything to add, do so in the comments. The goal of this blog is to serve as a discussion board for support and hope. To crowd-source that help and that hope and provide resources to our community.

What's the best way to manage or prevent stress?
I think we can all relate to this and it's no different for high school students. If anything, I think students today have even more pressure on them to be something they may never be able to live up to. (And yes, social media has a lot to do with that.) So, here's my advice, set boundaries for yourself. Don't be afraid to say no to helping plan another school event or going to that party. It's ok to take some time for yourself, actually it's not just ok, its necessary for our survival. And be honest about why you're saying no. "I'm feeling overwhelmed and I would rather take the time to recharge so I can come back stronger than to commit to something I can't give 100% to right now." "I do want to hang out but I'm feeling anxiety and stress and I think I need a day to myself." Preventing stress is impossible. We're wired for it. And sometimes we can strive in stressful situations. We just have to keep our well-being top of mind, be honest about what we need, and reach out for help when we can't do it alone anymore.

Some of my friends have told me that the relationship I'm in isn't healthy. How do I know if I'm in a toxic relationship? What should I do if I am? Where can I go for help or who should I talk to?
This is something I unfortunately can relate to all too well. I don't talk about the details because I've chosen not to hurt the people who hurt me and truthfully, I still care deeply about them. But, I was in a physically and emotionally abusive relationship in high school which led me down a dangerous path of emotionally abusive boyfriends until I was 28 years old.

First, if your friends think your relationship isn't healthy, they are probably right. And you will likely hate them for it, at first.
Secondly, if you have to ask, you are likely in a toxic relationship. You should never feel afraid or less than the person you are dating. You should never let another person make you question your own self-worth. ​Mental abuse can lead you to think the worst about yourself and, the longer to stay, the more you will believe it. Which will just lead you down a dangerous cycle of more abuse, trust me.

If there is any violence AT ALL, whether thats "just when they're drunk" or because "they had a bad day," that's NOT OK. If you're having to make excuses for them, you're not in a healthy relationship. If you are experiencing any sort of violence, get out immediately and tell someone, right NOW. DO NOT WAIT UNTIL ITS TOO LATE.

That doesn't mean that the person you care about, and probably even love, is a bad person. That doesn't even mean that you don't love them. Like I mentioned, I still care deeply about the people I dated that hurt me. But it does mean that they need the kind of help that you are not capable of giving. Talking to a trusted adult about both your situation and theirs can help you both. It's not an easy thing to admit. And confronting the person you're with is not the answer. They will likely be combative and again, you are not capable of providing them the help they need. YOU HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF BEFORE YOU CAN BE THERE FOR ANYONE ELSE.

There are a host of counselors and therapists in the area that are trained to handle abusive or toxic relationships, especially in teens. So, ask for help and I promise you, you (and they) will be better for it.

Wow, ok. I still have 12 more questions to go but I will end this post here and pick up where I left off another day. I hope this helps. I hope you know you're not alone. And I hope you know that there are people you can turn to for help.

-Chelsea Borruano, Founder | Executive Director

THS IS OUR STORY

​Traumatic events left untended that grow into demons that become almost unbearable to face.

Don't let it get to you, you'll be fine, just push through it.

I made it through the rest of my shift fine, laughing and joking around per usual, but when I left that night, I crumbled.

I would sit on whoever’s floor, and I would sob, begging my friends to help me because I was tired of fighting alone.

That became my norm. Drunk everyday after shift, crying alone, but smiling in front of my friends and co workers so that know one would know I was slowly dying.

When I was 21 I had an episode that I can only describe as some sort of psychosis where I was having constant panic attacks for 3 days straight and couldn’t distinguish between reality and dreams.

My story actually started on this day, six years ago and along with it so came my daily struggle with anxiety and depression.

I believed that the sadness started on the day that my husband left me.

I had a son roughly 7 months ago. He is my third child, my second son. By around a week we knew he had issues, but by 3 weeks, I knew something was wrong with me. I am the 1 in 7. I had PPD.

My mom who is the best mom anyone could ever hope for doesn’t understand depression. She just did not understand what was wrong with me.

I have flashbacks of that day sometimes, hearing people laughing and having the time of our lives, feeling the sun beating down and the slight breeze from the water, all the while having no inclination of the tragedy that we would soon have to endure.

At times my depression felt like it danced with my trauma but stepped on my soul in glass shattering steps.

Funny how someone else's PTSD and depression basically triggered my own.

The days, months and years to follow have been a constant struggle between wanting to live for him and not being able to live without him, wanting to tell my story but also not wanting to be defined by it and more deeply feeling the constant anxiety of losing those closest to me.

I couldn’t simply feel better. I couldn’t say…didn’t know how to articulate… that the sadness was growing.

Living in a dark hole of fear and sadness is so foreign to them, but to those of us who live with it daily, it's an all too real prison.

What if…I mean what if…I don’t notice that the semi in front of me stopped for railway tracks? The other driver would be okay. And I wouldn’t have to feel this growing thing inside me anymore.

I will never forget where I was when I literally wanted to jerk my car off the road into a telephone post.

What does PPD look like? It knows no bounds. It does not discriminate on the basis of age or race. It doesn't care what your religion is or how you were brought up. It doesn't care how much you love your children, how hard it was for you to have them, how you got there, or how long you waited and prayed for them. 1 in 7.

The longest journey of my life (a 10 year process) was looking at the scars and acknowledging the depression flowing inside my body.

As she writes, she realizes that the end of her life as a child sex slave, was the beginning of a beautiful life (foreordained by her loving Father in heaven), which she could have never imagined possible.

My name is Dianna Pippins and I am a US Army female Veteran that suffers from PTSD and anxiety due to Military Sexual Trauma while serving my country. Everyday is a challenge and it very hard to just live. I and others like me have suffered in silence for way too long.

I had the overwhelming fear that the people I loved would be taken from me and it was a fear I thought I had to live with, I thought it was my burden to bear until I woke up one morning and decided to get help.

Hope saved me in the same likeness like when a wildfire is finally tamed and controlled.

Food can truly change someone’s life and often makes me wonder who else is suffering because of the food we consume.

I found a therapist the following week. I vomited the Darkness in front of him as brutal as I could stomach. His response, “You’re not always going to feel like this.”

I didn’t get help until I was standing on a desolate plain behind the remnants of bombarded walls.

Broken… Hopeful

It was honestly a hundred little things that helped me survive. It was baby ducks coming up to me by the LSU lakes, it was laughter and connection, it was deciding that I wanted more from life, and it was acknowledging that I could be resilient despite all the trauma and darkness.

Other’s transparency about their own mental health struggles helped me feel like I wasn’t alone.

Nothing feels more comforting than realizing that what you face every day, and what seems insurmountable, is not unique to you; you really are not alone.

I AM FREE. And to think IT all had to do with diet. I am truly convinced I am not alone in this food thing.

I could learn to live with myself, and not let my PTSD and depression be the definition of my life. I don't know that she'll ever know it, but that counselor saved my life.

Depression and anxiety are very real and though some forms come from experiences such as mine and others from chemical imbalances, the most important thing to know is that YOU AREN'T ALONE and I'm not alone. We are all in this together.